Monday, June 25, 2012

A Golf Course Is A Waste of A Perfectly Good Rifle Range

Last Friday I attended a golf outing.

Unfortunately, Golf and I do not get along.

Indeed, I'm perhaps the worst golfer ever. This is unfortunate because as an attorney as you're somehow supposed to be good at golf. I'm too busy working to play golf or learn to play well, and I'd rather not give up the scuba diving to go around hitting a ball with a stick.

After all, I can scuba dive at night, golf, not so much.

On the upside, it was a scramble so my ineptness didn't hamper the other three players in my group. I was more the comic relief than anything else. They carried me quite handily and they sure as heck could play. They were all very helpful with tips in terms of club selection and stance and were quite encouraging so it was more a fun social gathering than 18 holes of torture.

I had two highlights.

One was sinking a putt with the pressure on:

"The three of us are not bringing our putters to the green Aaron, you're going to sink this one."

Uh, crap, ok....and I did.

The other highlight was more one of infamy. One of the players gave me his Taylormade R11 driver to try. Now the R11 is a beast of a club and just plain awesome to hold and swing. He could do magic with it. Me, not so much.

So I'm about to tee off, focussing intently on the ball and don't see two other players from the next scramble group (just two of them so they got to do everything twice to keep it lively) who have crept up in front and off to the left of me. Note the in front part.

I swing and whamo! The ball goes off the heel and straight at them at the speed of sound, narrowly missing one of them and likely creasing his pant leg. (I felt terrible, but he was untouched, and after all they came to the nuisance knowing I suck and standing in front of a newbie with a club...)

So I at least got the award for "Ball closest to another golfer", or I would have had there been such an award.

Anyways our group finished 6 under par. Like I said, they were good.

I really need to take some lessons and get some practice in before I head out again....or get a club like this, but I doubt it's legal for scramble play...

Meanwhile, yesterday Obama played his 101st round of golf in his term as president.

That's practically a round of golf every other week during his entire presidency. I figure his vacations got in the way of some other rounds...

Before you say "But Bush played golf too!", He played only 24 rounds his entire presidency. Over eight years.

Ah, Golf.

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