Remember, It's April Fool's Day Today, Not April Absolutely Moronic Criminal Idiot's Day

Some people clearly can't distinguish the difference between being a fool and being a complete and utter criminal moron. 

The Detroit News: Macomb County schools receive bomb threats; at least 1 cancels classes Monday

Bomb threats are never acceptable as an April Fool's Day prank. They never have been -- and with good reason.

Idiots.

Some April Fools Jokes Are Hard To Distinguish From Reality

The Road Commission for Oakland County posted this on Facebook today:

 

The problem with this April Fool's post by the OCRC is that it is not at all out of the realm of possibility and indeed probability for the now DEI- and Democrat-driven Oakland County Road Commission to actually do something this stupid.

Mueller Investigation Back On!

This morning, Special Counsel Robert Mueller announced that he was resuming his investigation into the question of collusion of Russia with the Trump campaign.

Democrats all across America cried tears of joy, a clear contrast to the rivers of sadness that had been flowing since the release of the Special Cunsel's report.

Mueller announced that after $29 million dollars spent and 2 years searching for evidence of Russian collusion without finding a shred of any such activity, he realized he had not searched everywhere yet.

"I had looked high, I had searched low", he said, "and I found nothing".

"But in all this searching I forgot to look under my bed. I just looked there this morning." He said. "Sure enough, there was a dossier labelled "Open this for proof of Russian Collusion" and it had everything I needed to prove all the allegations made by the DNC. The million dollars in small unmarked bills right beside the dossier with a note that said 'Get Trump, Love H.' didn't influence his decision to reopen the investigation one bit.

Mueller plans to release an updated report this afternoon.

Happy April Fools' Day, Democrats.

Glock's Latest Model Announced

Glock has announced that the model G45 will be formally rolled out at the NRA Annual Meeting, and they released a sneak peek today:

Yes, they've finally joined the rest of the pack with a 1911 style polymer wunderpistole.

Happy late but not yet over April Fools Day.

AWNAA Bill introduced in Congress

AWNAA, if passed, would create jobs for the Unabled:

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid introduced today the Americans With No Abilities Act (AWNAA).

AWNAA is expected to create up to 25 million mid-level jobs with good titles, good pay, and little or no responsibility for the substantial minority of U.S. citizens with no recognizable skills.

Using as its model the U.S. Post Office, where approximately 74% of employees fit that profile, and certain industries in the private sector such as the airline industry and home improvement retailers, AWNAA is designed to ensure long-term employment for this neglected group of Americans. President Barack Obama told reporters in a press conference today “As a President with no abilities, I believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to provide each and every American with no ability space to take up and a good salary for doing so.”






Happy April 1, everyone.