Friday, June 30, 2017

Scenes From A Courtroom

In court yesterday to expunge my client's plead-to conviction for misdemeanor brandishing of a firearm (a reduction from felony carry of a Taser prior to Tasers being legal to carry in Michigan), and all worked out very well and she can go on with her life now.

While we're waiting to be called however, people are getting their tickets processed and numerous miscreants are showing up from jail and a few stand out.

Scene 1: Quit While You're Ahead

A lady is called up by the prosecutor on her ticket, speeding 17 over in a school zone.

Sadly for the lady in question, the prosecutor is not a township or City but one from oakland COunty and they tend to be a little harder on things.

The prosecutor offers her a deal of 2 points and regular speeding not in a school one.

This, for those who don't know, is a very nice deal considering the speeding in school zone at her speed is 4 points and expensive.

The lady however wants the points gone. That's not going to happen says the prosecutor. After some back and forth the prosecutor finally says you can take the deal or set it for a hearing and we will have the deputy come in and testify as to your speed and there will be no deal.

You guessed it, she demands a hearing because she thinks that will get rid of her points. . . .Good luck with that.

Scene 2: If You Can't Even Do That Right, What Makes You Think You Can Represent Yourself?

So our miscreant gets hauled in from jail.

At the outset the judge asks his name and age.

"Name, I'm uh 62".

The judge asks him when he filled out the form the judge has which he holds up.

"Uh, just before they brought me in here."

The judge, much to the courtroom's bemusement, asks him if he just had a birthday.

"Uh, no."

Well, the judge asks, how is it you wrote you were 61 on the form and now a few minutes later you say you're 62?"

"Uh, well, you know, hard to remember sometimes, something something drink in Tennessee". [People in the courtroom: Wat?].

The Judge then says: Sir, the form you just filled out was to represent yourself in your case and you've now just said you can't even keep your own age straight, are you sure you really want to represent yourself?

"Uh, that might just not be a great idea".

The judge agrees it is not the best idea the fellow has ever had, and adjourns it for him to get a public defender.

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